Thursday, April 30, 2009

Patient Zero

Thanks to Jeev for sharing this photo. Now we know the true source of swine flu. Parents...keep your dirty lil' tots away from the farm, 'aight?

I bet the lil' bugger's probably somewhere in Oklahoma, making kids and bovine sick everywhere. Patient Zero, that is, not Jeev.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Fun Times In the Mookie

Oh yeah, there was one funny moment tonight, thanks to everyone's favorite comedic poker blogger and originator of the truly and aptly named Stupid System:

Julius_Goat: all I ask for is the occassional five outer
Mondogarage: the only reason you didn't win
Mondogarage: is that you had too many outs
Mondogarage: I can fade the 5-outers
Julius_Goat: you have a good point there
Mondogarage: I can't fade the 2- or 3- outers
Julius_Goat: solid work
Julius_Goat: you just did solid work, mondo

Yup, that was my real secret to the deep run...the villians had too many outs to catch.

FML - Part 47

I almost never play the Mookie. Why? Don't have time. It's a bad night of the week. But not tonight, I could play.

Of course, on the rare occasions I do play, I invariably run KK into AA, or QQ into KK, within the first ten hands of the damn tournament. But not tonight, I could play.

Play how? Play tight. Play MiamiDon tight. Survive and thrive. Play tight enough that preflop raises are sometimes respected. Fold when you're beat. Put pressure on when your ahead.

Through 2.5 hours of the tourney, I'd seen 12 flops in 180 hands, but had won 27 pots, and had stacked at least three players.

So what happens on the bubble? FML, part 47, of course.

In the BB with 77, and 7th of 11 remaining in chips, and two relative shorties. Folds to the SB, who raises 3x (to 3,000). It's the effin Mookie, everyone raises from the button or small blind. So I debate, call or shove. If I call, I'm probably folding to most flops. So I shove. Of course. SB had AA.

Of course, I don't hit my 2-outer and I go out 11th, when I could have easily made the $$$, with at least a slight chance at a TOC seat in about my 4th BBT4 tourney. (Though Pauly's running over everyone, and I'll be shocked if he doesn't take it down.)

Of course I made a mistake least I think so. I had 16BB left when that hand started. But it's the fuckin' Mookie and, I repeat, everyone raises when folded to them on the button or small blind in the Mookie. With anything. With everything. Of course, nobody expects...the Spanish Inquisition.

FML. For at least the 47th time.

Sometimes the Cows Do Come Home to Roost

Ahh...not much to say this week poker-wise. I did stumble into a 4th place finish in a Limit O8 MTT last Thursday, but the night was still a loser overall. Mostly due to the O8 MTT being a $5 buy-in, while busting short of the money in an $11r, a $20+2, and giving up five buyins in a $5r...but I digress.

Likely no poker at all this week, since my band has a gig tomorrow night. Which reminds me, please visit our site and check out our new recording "Horse".

What I really wanted to stop by for was to share a lil' bit of ye olde schadenfreude, and one of my favorite recipes, at that.

See, for most of this entire decade, those on the right have been defending, and mightly so, I must add, the former Bush administration's warrantless secret wiretapping and eavesdropping of American citizens. And yes, you can be on the right of a lot of issues and still be a member of the Democratic Party, because in the end, if you're a politician, you're more likely to be a member of whichever party is most likely to help you get elected.

That's why legions of Texas politicians from the end of the civil war, through 1980, were Democrats. It ain't because they were libruls, that's for sure. But after the Civil War, you couldn't get elected in the South for 100 years if you were a Republican. Which brings us to today's hero goat, Jane Harman. Essentially, Ms. Harmon's been, for all intents and purposes, a complete Republican through and through when it comes to toeing that party's line on matters of dollars and cents, but is too far to the left when it comes to abortion to be electable as a Republican.

Jane, you see, is not only one of the wealthiest members of Congress, but also the Democratic Party's most vociferous supporter of the warrantless wiretapping program. She's been quoted as saying, "I believe the program is essential to U.S. national security and that its disclosure has damaged critical intelligence capabilities." And when the press blew up the secret program, she not called the whistleblowers "despicable", she argued for curtailing freedom of the press under the 1st Amendment.

Well, as Glenn Greenwald pointed out yesterday on Salon, it's funny what happens when the shoe is on the other foot.

I asked Attorney General Holder to...investigate whether other members of Congress or other innocent Americans might have been subject to this same treatment. I call it an abuse of power in the letter I wrote him this morning. . . .

I'm just very disappointed that my country -- I'm an American citizen just like you are -- could have permitted what I think is a gross abuse of power in recent years. I'm one member of Congress who may be caught up in it, and I have a bully pulpit and I can fight back. I'm thinking about others who have no bully pulpit, who may not be aware, as I was not, that someone is listening in on their conversations, and they're innocent Americans.

NOW, Jane Harman is against wiretapping? NOW, Jane Harman wants a full government investigation, now that SHE is the one being taped? Taped under a court-issued warrant, I might add?

Hey Jane, go fuckin' drown in the bathtub of your own hypocrisy, why don't ya. You're FOR warrantless wiretapping, yet you claim yourself to be a victim of a "gross abuse of power" when you were tapped under a fully court-approved warrant. I've got a better idea, why don't we ship YOU got Guantanamo, since you seem to think you're no longer subject to the same laws as the rest of us Americans.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Amber Alert

This is not a joke.

If you live in or around Arapahoe County, Colorado, please read this post by Frank Frisna about his 14-year old missing niece.

Copied and pasted from Pauly's blog (this is too creepy, and I hope this young woman is found, and in good health).

April 15th, 2009
My 14yr old niece is missing...

I was really hoping I would never have to write this here...

My niece Jennifer has been missing since Saturday night. She left here at 3pm to go to a friend's house and was to be home by 8. None of her friends have talked to her since 7pm that night and there is no sign that she ran away. No clothes... no cell phone charger... nothing to suggest that she had any intention of being away that long. She has never been more than an hour or so late and this is beyond her character. There was no trouble here and she was in a good mood when she left.

It took us a few days to get the police to take this seriously since the responding officer on Saturday night had her pigeon holed as a runaway from the start. Thanks to that moron we have lost precious time. Now we have the Colorado Bureau of Investigations involved and they are trying to get phone records quicker than I seem to be able to get them. We would have had them already but CBI needed the Arapahoe County Sheriff to upgrade from runaway to missing. The next step is to get her picture on the local news stations.

I cannot describe the torment we are all going through. My worst nightmare has come true... The idea of seeing her picture on the news is something I don't think I could ever be prepared for. I am going to want to include a reward for any information leading to her safe return. If she is hiding out... it is going to be hard for some 14-15 yr old friend of hers to keep quiet should there be money involved. I have $500 that I can start it with… Thanks to my ongoing medical bills, it is every penny I have to my name right now. If anyone would like to donate the cause, please send via paypal to - (* should no reward be issued…. monies will be returned.) If I get some of this other cash I waiting on, it will be added.

I have never needed the help of our readers more than now. Please take her pictures and info posted here and send out to your social networks.

For those of you who know me... know these kids are my life. I am the legal guardian of both my niece and nephew. I consider them my children and have dedicated my life to their happiness. I have always been there to make sure they had a father figure and someone to count on. I am living pure hell and each day that passes is killing my soul. I have been through too much to be burdened with more heartache. This has gotta be resolved soon… I would give my life to bring her home.

One thing that is getting harder to do is handle all the phone calls from concerned friends and family…. The constant updates are wearing me down so I will be posting here any major updates we have. You can also follow my twitter account.

That’s all I have for right now...

Jennifer… if you are reading this… I love you more than you will ever know and you are my best friend in the world… nobody is mad at you... mom is here too.. come home...

- Frank Frisina

Please spread the word about Frank's missing niece. Contact him at with any information.

Feel free to cut and paste this entire post into your blogs. I encourage you to spread the word. Thank you.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Spreadin' the Sonic Alt-Country Love

Okay, I can't seem to actually post a file to this here blog, but my lil' band New Ben Franklins has our first recording up of the current iteration.

As long as you don't have Myspace blocked, you can go here and click on Horse 2009 in the embedded music player, if you want a wee taste of what keeps me away from the poker tables most of these days.

It may or may not end up being the final mix of what ends up on our eventual album, but the most excellent Radio 1190 (University of Colorado's radio station) wanted something from us in advance of our next show, which they're presenting at the Larimer Lounge on the 23rd, so we recorded this track over the last week.


BTW, if you're local to Denver and seeing this, you should really come out to this show. Jim McTurnan's new band is a-freakin-mazing, and Dario's long had one of the best bands in town.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Finally, A Long-Awaited (Near) Breakthrough

Any of the three or four kind souls who follow this here lil' blog know that the last several months have been absolutely brutal to my online roll. In fact, I was already beginning to carve the headstone on my meager online poker career, as I have had no plans of reloading ever I ever go busto.

Well, at least after last night, that's been put off for a while.

For once, I wasn't getting 2- and 3-outed on the river, on the bubble.

For once, I even caught from behind in a key spot.

For once, I not only cashed, but final tabled.

Anyway, I'm pleased as punch...thanks to Bodog and their evening $5r, which at one point in time was a very nice tournament for me. Prior to last night, I know I've won this tourney once, and I think I had a runner-up finish, as well.

At first, things went as per usual. I took my standard upfront rebuy, and chipped up enough so at the end of the rebuy period, I was sitting slightly above average chips, without additional rebuys. Obviously, I added on. So with about 126 left, and 18 paying, I was in okay shape. I picked up a few pots here and there, but hit my midstretch of horrible cards, to where with 26 players left, I was 25th or 26th in chips. I thought "here we go again". With 20 left, I was 20th in chips. Again, "here we go again, Mr. Bubble Boy".

However, my good luck charm the Ultimate Bodog Shill, was sitting two to my left, and when it folded to me on the button, with me holding 3BBs, I shoved rather light, and Smokkee folded. Thank you, Smokkee, you made it possible.

Anyway, I did manage to crack the money, and here's where it got good. Shortly into it, with blinds at 1k/2k and some ante, mid position decided to limp. I looked down at 98soooted, and decided to see a flop. The flop came 99T, and it was off to the races. I check, the BB led out for about 3-4k, and mid position called. Obviously, I shoved, the BB folded, and the original limper called and showed down AA. Way to limp, buddy. That pot made my day.

Eventually, I managed to crack the final table (Smokkee had crashed out 13th or 14th by then), with a 7th place stack, and and M of about 6. But the cards decided to play nice. At one point, with seven or eight players left, and me on basically the shortest stack, the luck turned my way. It folded to me in the small blind, and I shoved my last five or so big blinds with A8o. I was bummed but not surprised when BB called and turned over JJ. But by the turn, I'd picked up straight and crub frush draws, and actually hit the river A. Not exactly a two-outer, but me catching from behind is so rare, it seems. But it was just what I needed to roll on.

At one point, I picked up AA in the small blind, and two mid position limpers. I thought of raising 3 or so BB, but there was already enough in the pot to take my stack up over 50%, so I shoved, to a pack of folders. I took my first chiplead of the tournament when there were five players left. But when we got three handed, we did a lot of trading chips. BTW, my compliments go out to both mixxmaster and WTFisLUCK for their skilled play at this stage.

However, I was eventually able to get to HU with WTFisLUCK, where I held a 480k to 295k chiplead. Sadly for me, that was to be the high point. The cards turned bad, and my opponent was appropriately aggressive. When we had nearly equal chipstacks, I raised up with 66, he overshoved A9, I called, he hit his 9, and that was that. I have no complaints about finishing 2nd there. I could have folded the 66, but that seems real nitty with about 7BB left in an HU situation.

Still, I have no complaints whatsoever about finally picking up a semi-real cash. Last night may have been only a $500 prize, which is a lunch tab for some of you rollers, but for me, it more than doubled my recently-abused roll, and should allow me to continue to donk online for at least a couple more months.

Good luck to all at the tables, I'll be off at the western world's most fabulous cathedral for Opening Day.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Standard Issue Suck/Resuck

Well, I have been managing to play some online poker about one night a week these days. Usually on Thursday, which coincides with lil' Yorvie's day in doggy day care. He's so wiped out from being with all those other dogs all day long, that all he wants to do in the evening is sleep. And when Yorvie sleeps, Mondo can donk it up, woo!!

Overall, I'm still getting crushed. I honestly don't know how to turn around this six month downswing. But I'm trying real hard to keep playing aggressively, and not worry about results anymore. Still, the bankroll continues its inexorable slide to oblivion, so this blog may end sooner rather than later. Still, with playing only one night a week, I've got a while to go yet.

Anyway, I just wanted to share a typical example of my inevitable downfall:

PokerStars Game #26299569628: Tournament #150346308, $3.00+$0.40 Omaha Hi/Lo No Limit - Level XI (600/1200) - 2009/03/24 2:19:03 ET
Table '150346308 1' 9-max Seat #7 is the button
Seat 4: simishove (8992 in chips)
Seat 5: nteagles (3699 in chips)
Seat 7: Mondogarage (14309 in chips)
simishove: posts the ante 75
nteagles: posts the ante 75
Mondogarage: posts the ante 75
simishove: posts small blind 600
nteagles: posts big blind 1200
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Mondogarage [Kh Kd Jd 9c]
Mondogarage: raises 3600 to 4800 (try to push out marginal lows and TID now)
simishove: folds
nteagles: calls 2424 and is all-in
nteagles: shows [6c Td Ac As] (do'h!)
Uncalled bet (1176) returned to Mondogarage
*** FLOP *** [7c Qc Ks] (whut? I caught 2-outer, but villian has flush redraw)
*** TURN *** [7c Qc Ks] [Ad] (naturally, crubs not hit, but the unliklier 2-out A does)
*** RIVER *** [7c Qc Ks Ad] [Ah] (okay, now that's just gratuitous knife twisting, no?)
*** SHOW DOWN ***
nteagles: shows [6c Td Ac As] (HI: four of a kind, Aces)
Mondogarage: shows [Kh Kd Jd 9c] (HI: a full house, Kings full of Aces)
nteagles collected 8073 from pot
No low hand qualified
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 8073 | Rake 0
Board [7c Qc Ks Ad Ah]
Seat 4: simishove (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 5: nteagles (big blind) showed [6c Td Ac As] and won (8073) with HI: four of a kind, Aces
Seat 7: Mondogarage (button) showed [Kh Kd Jd 9c] and lost with HI: a full house, Kings full of Aces

At least I didn't go out in 3rd place, but as nteagles already knew, catching quads against me is cake:

PokerStars Game #26299726590: Tournament #150346308, $3.00+$0.40 Omaha Hi/Lo No Limit - Level XIV (1500/3000) - 2009/03/24 2:31:17 ET
Table '150346308 1' 9-max Seat #7 is the button
Seat 5: nteagles (10096 in chips)
Seat 7: Mondogarage (16904 in chips)
nteagles: posts the ante 150
Mondogarage: posts the ante 150
Mondogarage: posts small blind 1500
nteagles: posts big blind 3000
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Mondogarage [6c 6d 3d 4s]
Mondogarage: raises 13754 to 16754 and is all-in
nteagles: calls 6946 and is all-in
Uncalled bet (6808) returned to Mondogarage
*** FLOP *** [5d As Ac]
*** TURN *** [5d As Ac] [Ts]
Mondogarage said, "lol"
*** RIVER *** [5d As Ac Ts] [5c]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
nteagles: shows [4c 5h Ah 5s] (HI: four of a kind, Fives)
Mondogarage: shows [6c 6d 3d 4s] (HI: two pair, Aces and Sixes)
nteagles collected 20192 from pot
No low hand qualified
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 20192 | Rake 0
Board [5d As Ac Ts 5c]
Seat 5: nteagles (big blind) showed [4c 5h Ah 5s] and won (20192) with HI: four of a kind, Fives
Seat 7: Mondogarage (button) (small blind) showed [6c 6d 3d 4s] and lost with HI: two pair, Aces and Sixes

Saturday, April 04, 2009

Knock Knock

Your National Championship is knocking at the front door, and where's the mighty vaunted oh-so-much-better-than-any-other-conference Big East?

Oh, they're not invited.

Hell, they didn't even get three in the Final Four, which so many east coast bloggers was certain was a mere formality.

Sorry, Hoy. Maybe next year. Or not.

But hey, it's baseball time, enjoy your average $72 ticket cost in new Yankee Stadium on the way to another 3rd place finish.

At this point, the Rockies are a complete crapshoot. Offensively, the purple pinstripers should be much improved over 2008. Our bullpen is the best in the NL West. Our starting rotation? We have a #2 and #3 in the #1 and 2 slots, followed by three question marks. But that's why they play the games. You can find me next Friday in Section 145.